Chicky-Chicky Parm-Parm

In the last post, I introduced a drinking game for the imaginary reader. The game includes the rule "drink every time I use cheese". Given the title of this post, you're going to need to have a beverage handy for this one.

I also made the rule that you should drink every time I make an excuse as to why my meal was less than healthy, so brace yourself, here's the bit where I run through my excuses. First, it's cold. It was 21°C yesterday, and suddenly it's below freezing and there's ice and snow. No-one wants to eat quinoa and shrimp in the cold, that's hot weather food. Second, my husband is having a bit of a bad time. His newly-purchased used-car won't start, and he's not able to fix it right now. He's waiting on a check from his employer, the check was supposed to be here on Saturday (it's Monday). He's a bit fed up. When someone is fed up, and it's cold, and they are a hairy man with a beard, and you like to take care of them and show them that everything's going to be alright by providing a home-cooked loving meal and kissing them on the head, what are you supposed to make!? Cabbage soup? I mean, soup's a good shout to be fair, and cabbage is a wintery vegetable, but we've been making a lot of soup lately (more excuses). Anyway, I tried to think of something that contained solids, and that my husband might be excited to eat.

I found this recipe on BBC food, for a dish based around chicken, bacon, pasta, double-cream, cheese and fresh basil. It looked delicious, but pretty unhealthy - with 10 fluid ounces of double cream! The version that I made had no double cream (which is 50 calories per tablespoon), instead it had 8 fluid ounces of sour cream (a comparatively reasonable 30 calories per tablespoon) and some chicken stock. The recipe asked for chicken thigh, but I used skinless chicken breast. I used Parmesan cheese instead of cheddar because it's has a stronger flavour so you don't need to use as much, and I'd guess it contains fewer calories. I did, however, keep the bacon. Bacon's delicious. When I use red meat, you take a nice big drink.

So, yeah, I browned the chicken and the bacon in a little butter (only because of I'd run out of olive oil, but you, dear imaginary reader, must drink, and then drink again for my poor excuse). I added a chicken bouillon cube and a lot of garlic (possibly 5 cloves). I then stirred in the sour cream and let it warm up again. Then I thew the cheese and the torn basil onto the pan. You should imagine this is slow mo. I threw that Parmesan into that pan a bit like how potently seductive secretaries are thrust onto a desk by their employer in a frenzy of lust and passion, sending staplers and paper clips flying. I'm pretty sure I sexually assaulted the Parmesan, the filthy bitch had been giving me the eye, and I couldn't help myself. Unlike a sexy administrator, the sauce was pretty runny. I could add flour in future to make it thicker but it really didn't matter, it was quite titillating just as it was. I poured the sauce over some fat wholewheat pasta (like penne, but bigger and really wide), and served with additional sexy blonde Parmesan and coarse cracked black pepper.

It was delicious. :)

Chicky-chicky parm-parm!

If you are disappointed in my meal, for it's use of bacon, cheese, butter and poor sexual references- fear not! It gets better! I made a very nutritious side salad. I chopped up two romaine lettuce hearts, added mixed nuts, pumpkin seeds and dried cranberries (which are my favourite!). I added a few cheesy croutons to try to persuade my son that the salad was a friend. These croutons were not delicious, and did not fool my son one iota. I also picked up a super yummy 'light' balsamic vinaigrette. The salad was sooo yum!  I get more excited about a good salad than anyone I know! Sadly, when you add nuts and vinaigrette (even when it says light on the packaging), the salad gets high in calories pretty quickly, but it's just so delicious and healthy too, I do not feel bad about that. If the Parmesan and basil was a sexual encounter, the salad was a walk in a national park, just as thrilling, but no one's getting divorced.

This is the salad as I put it on the table, covered in nuts, croutons and dried cranberries.

This is my side salad, with the yummy dressing. 

The whole thing was delicious. The house smells delicious. I'm sat here with my handsome and a cup of tea, a piece of chocolate and a full belly. The Christmas tree is up, you've had a few drinks, I'm writing to imaginary people, and we're all quite concerned about money. It's beginning to feel a lot like Christmas!